"I am in mis-er-y
There ain't nobody who can comfort me
Oh yeah . . ."
Maroon Five sure got it right. I am hurtin' and am in some definite misery. In case you hadn't heard, Leslie went to freakin' boot camp today. It's free where I work.
See let me explain something to you.Where I work, this institution of higher learning has one of the best culinary programs in the nation. And the bastards in the culinary program let the devil use them to make cakes and bring them to your office to try out. Then they run a deli/baker and a restaurant that once you keep hitting because they are so cheap and so good, you end up gaining more than 30 pounds in three years. Ain't that a bitch?
So then you get a bunch of unions together who tell our HR dept, "Hey, we fat. Pay for us to be healthy." The next thing you know there's some dude down in the fitness center barking orders at you and you end up upside down jumping rope on a treadmill with a pair of weights up your a$$. That my friends, is the devil's work. And it's where I am. But it's all good right? I'm not sure, but I think my legs are going to fall off tonight.
Laura Schlessinger is a n-word. I forgot to say that yesterday. And if you don't know why I said that, you better ask somebody.
Did you know that Godon Ramsay (Hell's Kitchen) once burned his balls on a stove while he was yelling at a student?
We've been riding one of our friends, Amy, to get unlimited text message for a while now. Well now she's got it, and she's texted me everday to tell me she's got it, but just to be the ignoranomous that I can be at times, I've ignored all her texts. It's what I do.
Did you hear someone found Jesus today? Yeah, he was playing quarterback on the Minneosota Vikings practice field today. At least that's what you would have thought.
Do I have to say it again?
Sure I do.
So here goes.
EFF BRETT FAVRE.
Love,
Leslie
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